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Jeddah
Dawah Center P.
O. Box: 6897, Jeddah
- 21452 Tel:
682 9898 Fax: 6622662 Under
Supervision of MINISTRY
OF ISLAMIC AFFAIRS, ENDOWMENTS, PROPAGATION AND GUIDANCE
Tips
on Etiquettes while in The Arabian Gulf
So
many times we find some wisdom in proverbs, and I particularly mean here (While
in Rome do as the Romans do) One evening, some time back, about 25
years ago, when I was in Tokyo, Japan, on a training course with few Saudi
University colleagues, one of my colleagues dressed in white silky Arabian
Thobe as seen worn in Saudi Arabia and most other gulf countries.
To our amazement though, many Japanese nationals starred at our friend and
whispered to one another. We had at that time a Japanese coordinator whom
we asked what they were talking about. Not surprisingly the answer was
about the way our friend was dressed. Indeed
your self must have some personal stories of what you saw people wearing
on different occasion. For instance; can one go to a formal party wearing
sports attire? Or go to the beach wearing formal dress; obviously not. We
recognize a policeman by his uniform or a Restaurant waiter by his dress
or a doctor by his robe, and so forth. So in fact a dress signals a
message about the person wearing it. Many of us have been to other places
in the world on vacation or for a living, and we experienced the feeling
of being a stranger in another country. The situation is much worse when
the cultural and social background is noticeably different from our own,
like Saudi Arabia may be to some, and many come to Saudi Arabia with their
own habits and customs. In
a recent release from the department of labor’s affairs the number of
expatriates in the Kingdom is about 7.4 million, from 127 different
countries which
is in fact about one third of total population!!!. By
observing very simple etiquettes you can really help in preserving our own
culture and save yourself unnecessary embarrassment or remarks, and help
families in bringing up their youngsters according to the traditions and
customs of the Kingdom. If
we go back just a few years in the past where we can see what we watch in
some western cowboy movies where ladies dress in long garments and some
even cover their heads. It is not our concern here with how this has
changed within such a short time; but indeed even in the west wise people
don’t like their wives, daughters etc. to be a sex commodity by the way
they dress or appear and many oppose Ads and media content which
commodities female bodies. For an example: What does a shaving blade Ad
got to do with a woman in it? Now
lets read these two quotes: “Woman
are not to wear men’s clothing, and men are not to wear women’s
clothing; the Lord your God hates people who do such things.” “And
any woman who prays or proclaim God’s message in public worship with
nothing on her head disgraces her husband; there is no difference between
her and a woman whose head has been shaved.” Amazingly
many who read them think these quotes are from Islamic teachings, while in
fact they both are from the Bible (Deuteronomy 22:5) ; (Corinthians 11:5)
respectively, Now
lets hear what Qur’an said about the dress. “Say
to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their
modesty; that will make for greater purity for them; and Allah is well
acquainted with all that they do; and say to the believing women that they
should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not
display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear
thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not
display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their
husbands’ fathers, their sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers’
or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons, or their women or the
slaves whom their right hands possess, or small attendants free of sexual
desires, or small children who have no carnal knowledge of women; and that
they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their
hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! Turn ye all together towards Allah
in repentance that ye may be successful” (Interpretation
of the Holy Qur’an Surah An-Nur 24:30-31) In
an other verse the Holy Qur’an Says, “O
Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they
should cast their outer garments over their persons (when out doors); that
is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested
and Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Interpretation
of the Holy Qur’an Surah Al-Ahzab 33:59) Now
we obviously see that dress code in Saudi Arabia and the Gulf is really a
matter of Religion. Lets
now see some examples of what should men avoid wearing:
- Wearing
an earring for men which started as a symbol for gay societies and has now
become very common to everyone, is not allowed in Islam, and if you do so
you’ll shock others and should accept the consequences of what you may
get in to!! Wearing short clothes, above the knee, is not allowed in
Islam. Transparent clothes that make apparent your body is also unwelcome
attire. Wearing
publicly, symbols of religion like a cross on the neck is obviously not
accepted is Islam for both genders, other than that any dress is okay for
men. Ladies
should read the biblical verses stated earlier, and should refrain from
exposing any part of their body in a preserved conservative Islamic
society. Wearing
a Black cloak, called “Abaya” in Arabic, that covers the head
and hair usually is enough for a non-muslim woman. Under
the Abaya a dress that covers the body decently, e.g.: neck, arm and legs.
Should be worn so that if the cloak was to open accidentally there would
be nothing to draw unnecessary attention in public. As
I tune sometimes to (NPR) National Public Radio Station they place an Ad
to their servicemen and women serving abroad which I roughly quote
“Respect the Society of which you are in, don’t get yourself exposed
to situations you wouldn’t like to be in, adjust yourself to customs and
culture of the host country. That should make your stay more comfortable
and enjoyable”. The
Department of State has a similar advise to Americans Residing Abroad on
its web page which says: “ Read as much as possible about the country
where you plan to reside. Learning about a nation’s culture, customs,
people, and history will make your stay more meaningful”. I
think there is a piece of common sense and wisdom in that quote from a big
brother. Learning
about Islam will give you an opportunity to understand why and how Muslims
behave, act and live. Islam
is a way of life. Muslims observe the Qur’an and sayings of Prophet in
all matters of life, for example: Eating, drinking, dressing, worshipping,
buying, selling, politics etc… As
stated by one companion of the Prophet Muhammad “Peace Be Upon Him”
that: Islam taught us every thing even as simple as what one should do
while in the bathroom where Muslims use their left hand only for cleaning
after nature’s call. You can project from that, that Islam has a say in
even the simplest aspects of a Muslim’s life. You
may order your free copy of The Concept of Worship in Islam, to learn
about this from the publisher; by writing to the address on this pamphlet
or by viewing it on the web site (www. jdci.org ) . Which
ever is convenient for you. Here
I’ll list some very simple Etiquettes one can observe while in The Gulf
region and especially Saudi Arabia. *
Hand Shaking You’ll
quickly notice that men don’t shake hands with the strong griped fashion
you may be used to do in north America and Europe. It is usual that a man
shakes a hand of another just quietly, and that should not signal an ill
message to you. It is normal on the other hand that you’ll find men
don’t shake women’s hand that is part of Islamic teachings. This is
the same with women shaking men’s hands. That should not embarrass you,
as it is only a religious guidance, and not intended as any sort of
personal insult. Like
with Quaker Christians they don’t shake hands with the opposite gender. A
muslim who knows his religion will not shake the hand of any woman, even
if she is a Muslim woman, unless he is not allowed to marry her, like his
mother, sister, daughter of a son… etc. A
part from Islam, it is Arabic custom that when men or women meet with
their similar gender they kiss symbolically on each cheek, you’ll see
that right from the Airport when you arrive. *
Having a neighbor Don’t
be surprised if your Muslim neighbor cooked you some food and sent it over
your house. This
stems from the Prophet’s (Peace Be Upon Him) teachings, who said:
(He who believes in Allah and the last day must be hospitable to his
neighbor). In
return you may, as is customary to send them a plate of your cooking. *
Arabic Coffee It
is a custom that Arabic Coffee (Gahwa) is served its made of coffee and
cardamom) you’ll note that there are certain tradition in serving it.
The host will be carrying the coffee pot in the left arm and serving the
cups with his right arm. If you’ve had enough just lightly shake the
cup, with a quick but subtle twist of your wrist, as you hand it back. You
could alternatively cover the top of the cup with your left hand and hand
it back to host by your right arm. It is important to give and take things
with your right hand as to do so otherwise would be considered
irrespective. *
Siesta Remember
that many take a nap (siesta) at around 2:30 – till Al-Asr Prayer, which
is about 3:30, so it would not be a good time to make a call. *
It’s a Gift. Don’t
be surprised if you had shown you admiration of something belonging to
your host and he makes a gift of it to you. It is quite common and you may
accept it. If
on the other hand you brought a gift to an Arab friend don’t be
surprised if he doesn’t open it in front of you. He
or she may even sometimes start to kindly tell you “You should not have
taken the trouble.” but this is just a figure of speech. You should then
insist the gift be accepted and he’ll take it. *
While eating use only right hand You
may happen to notice in a restaurant that Muslims use only their right
hand while eating even if they are using a fork and knife for stake. You
will see him cut the piece holding the knife in his right hand and then
putting it aside and then place the fork in his right hand to eat that cut
portion. This is because the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) said: eat
with you right hand as the shaytan (devil) eats with his left hand. Other
forms of etiquette in Arabia will be published in a coming Publication of
this Center called “Very Simple Arabic and Some Regional Habits and
Customs.” A
final word before closing… We would very much like to invite you to
learn about Islam and its values and teachings which will assist you in
under standing Saudi people and their customs. For Islam is not theory or
rituals but really a complete practice in all aspects of life. Feel
free in writing, calling, faxing and/or emailing us at our address, or use
writer’s email ([email protected]) We
value your time contacting us. Thank
you once again, and you know you can help us by being good neighbors while
you stay among us in Saudi Arabia or any other Gulf country.
JEDDAH
DA’WAH CENTER HAYY
AS SALAMAH TIMUR
MASJID AS SYU’AIBI TELP
: 6829898 |
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